Obama’s 11th-Dimensional Chess On DADT Renders New START Treaty Superfluous

DADT passes both House and Senate….

…and there was much rejoicing.

Seriously, though, Gay Patriot’s B. Daniel Blatt’s meditations first on why DADT wouldn’t and shouldn’t pass and his subsequent thoughts on why it shouldn’t have passed reminded me of nothing so much as Ignatius J. Reilly’s premonition of the benefits we could expect from an all-gay military.  Given that Reilly’s prognostications were made way back in the ’60’s, it would make him somewhat of a seer on the subject:

Dear Reader,

Nature has sometimes made a fool, but a coxcomb is always of man’s own making. 

                                                                                                                   — Addison

As I was wearing the soles of my desert boots down to a mere sliver of crepe rubber on the old flagstone banquettes of the French Quarter in my fevered attempt to wrest a living from an unthinking and uncaring society, I was hailed by a cherished old acquaintance (deviate).  After a few minutes of conversation in which I established most easily my moral superiority over this degenerate, I found myself pondering once more the crises of our times.  My mentality, uncontrollable and wanton as always, whispered to me a scheme so magnificent and daring that I shrank from the very thought of what I was hearing.  “Stop!” I cried imploringly to my god-like mind.  “This is madness.”  But still I listened to the counsel of my brain.  It was offering me the opportunity to Save the World Through Degeneracy.  There on the worn stones of the Quarter I enlisted the aid of this wilted flower of a human in gathering his associates in foppery together behind a banner of brotherhood.

Our first step will be to elect one of their number to some very high office – the presidency, if Fortuna spins us kindly.  Then they will infiltrate the military.  As soldiers, they will all be so continually busy in fraternizing with one another, tailoring their uniforms to fit like sausage skins, inventing new and varied battle dress, giving cocktail parties, etc., that they will never have time for battle.  The one whom we finally make Chief of Staff will want only to attend to his fashionable wardrobe, a wardrobe which, alternately, will permit him to be either Chief of Staff or debutante, as the desire strikes him.  In seeing the success of their unified fellows here, perverts around the world will also band together to capture the military in their respective countries.  In those reactionary countries in which the deviates seem to be having some trouble in gaining control, we will send aid to them as rebels to help them in toppling their governments.  When we have at last overthrown all existing governments, the world will enjoy not war but global orgies conducted with the utmost protocol and the most truly international spirit, for these people do transcend simple national differences.  Their minds are one goal; they are truly united; they think as one.

None of these pederasts in power, of course, will be practical enough to know about such devices as bombs; these nuclear weapons would lie rotting in their vaults somewhere.  From time to time the Chief of Staff, the President, and so on, dressed in sequins and feathers, will entertain the leaders, i.e. the perverts, of all the other countries at balls and parties.  Quarrels of any sort could easily be straightened out in the men’s room of the redecorated United Nations.  Ballets and Broadway musicals and entertainments of that sort will flourish everywhere and will probably make the common folk happier than did the grim, hostile, fascistic pronouncements of their former leaders.

And there you have it, folks.  The whole gay agenda just laid out for all to see.  And – bonus – a clue to the 11th dimensional chess President Obama is playing.  With the passage of DADT, the START treaty becomes unnecessary.

*hat tip to Tintin at Sadly, No! for keeping us up-to-date on Gay Patriot’s latest public self-flagellation.