Home > Uncategorized > Eau du poseur? or perfume prodigy?

Eau du poseur? or perfume prodigy?

If you know me, you know I am motivated primarily by smell. I inhale deeply before I eat or buy or use anything .

So I got a kick out of this site.


A friend of mine once had a job naming colors for a carpet company. She loved to make up lipstick color names. However, she did not  have a manifesto.

CB shows us that smelly titles can be just as much fun.

The first thing I thought, in fact, was that I could use a good house spray this morning. Because CB could waft into my house and bottle “Essence of I cooked 3 heads of garlic last night trying to get rid of all these tomatoes.” 

Lyta, I couldn’t find “Absolute Pissant.” Maybe you could recommend that one.

Some of my own favorite smells: Clean Cubbie, the back of my children’s heads, bleached white towels, pinched basil, old books (but not mildewed books), daphne, dirt, lavender soap. And Chanel No. 5.


Bonus > Guess which four I just had to buy samples of?


  1. B^4
    July 29, 2011 at 2:03 pm

    A friend of mine once had a job naming colors for a carpet company. She loved to make up lipstick color names.

    We used to play a drinking game called “Tweeds”, in which we had to come up with new color names for the Tweeds catalog. My best contribution was “cinderblock”.

    • jennofark
      July 29, 2011 at 9:13 pm

      Sounds like it would coordinate well with “prison tattoo.”

  2. July 29, 2011 at 3:07 pm

    T&U pointed me to that site awhile back and I always meant to revisit it.

    Those names are great, and I’d love to give them all a whiff.

    I think basil is one of the most amazing-smelling things on earth. It smells like pepper and flowers to me. Why has no one made a Basil scent yet?

    Another option for the perfume-averse are these fragrances.

    • Larkspur
      July 29, 2011 at 7:42 pm

      I’ve often thought that if I ever get married, which I won’t, but shut up, I would carry a basil bouquet. When I buy basil in the market, I walk down the aisle as I am walking down the aisle. But I don’t do the funny aisle-walking aisle walk.

      • July 30, 2011 at 4:58 pm

        Ooooh, Larkspur, a basil bouquet sounds amazing.

  3. BDay
    July 29, 2011 at 9:41 pm

    A basil bouquet is a swell idea. I walk by my basil plants several times a day and pinch the tops off the flowers so my hands smell like basil. (Which almost covers the garlic on my fingers.) I’m going to start rubbing it on my pulse points and see what kind of looks I get.

    Love “cinderblock.” I have a sweater that exact color.

    As a kid, for some reason I loved the name “burnt sienna.” I had no idea what sienna was, but I knew what color it was when it was burned. In fact, I still have no idea what sienna is. The one I drove was minivan gray.

    • Larkspur
      July 30, 2011 at 7:40 pm

      My childhood color infatuation was for vermilion. It’s a red pigment in the cinnabar family. I may have considered changing my name to Vermilion.

  4. Celia Kennedy
    July 30, 2011 at 8:42 am

    Planning a coup in Patchouli Empire. Sienna is the Americanization of Cinnabar – almost idtentical, bastardized by the unpure, mongrel west by adding a sprinkling of red clay.

  5. July 30, 2011 at 5:05 pm
  6. B^4
    July 30, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    I’m not a cologne person, but I often infuse rubbing alcohol with rosemary as a substitute.

    Sienna and umber are both pigments derived from soil- the first from the outskirts of Sienna, Italy, the second from Umbria. Burt and raw describe whether or not the dirt was cooked in a kiln.

  7. BDay
    July 30, 2011 at 10:28 pm

    Thanks, B^4 and friend who once had a job naming colors for a carpet company, for the education on Crayola’s Sienna, Cinnabar and Umbria. Because you know what? colors should come from dirt, shouldn’t they?

    Looking up burnt umber v Umbria
    led me to a site I may never. Evar. Leave. . I’m pretty sure I’ve entered my blue period

  8. jennofark
    July 31, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    My guesses on your samples: Lavender Tea, In the Summer Kitchen, In the Library, and I’m thinking maybe Memory of Kindness or Walking in the Air. Pretty sure on the first three but not on the last.

    I’m thinking I may have to sample Ambrosius, Lavender Tea, Patchouli Empire, and Walking in the Air. Maybe Russian Caravan Tea as well. And the expensive one…Cradle of Light. It’s the tuberose, which doesn’t seem to feature in anything else he’s mixed up, though overall it sounds too flowery for me.

    Don Pardo, tell me what I’ve won….

  9. jennofark
    July 31, 2011 at 1:27 pm

    BTW, you do realize, don’t you, that this website is the J. Peterman catalog of perfume.

  10. jennofark
    July 31, 2011 at 1:32 pm

    Also, too: to bring it back to the topic of the last post, an awesome new scent could be made for “Something Nasty in the Woodshed.”

  11. Larkspur
    July 31, 2011 at 5:44 pm

    This site could give the J. Peterman catalog of alt perfume a run for its scents: Black Phoenix, and BTW, you had better correct my html mark-up stuff or I shan’t be back.

  12. September 2, 2011 at 10:27 am

    Yea now its hard to tell what a frargance smells like because of the name lol. These I can imagine! Burnt Leaves? Nice……

    I can only imagine what a wild pansy smells like lol ;)

  13. BDay
    September 23, 2012 at 11:32 pm

    No one ever guessed correctly. Jaffner, you got one right: Lavender Tea. You would’ve liked that one. Also got something along the lines of wet rotting earth. Which smells awful. The only one I kept was crushed fig leaf. It is bright and happy.

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